Man with a giant penis featured on preschool television

By Laura J. Wellington

You read it right, folks.  A man with a giant penis has made his home on Denmark’s primary children’s broadcaster.  Called John Dillermand, the series has preschoolers flocking to the screen to watch.  And we’ve been worried about the impact of little Johnny and little Suzie playing doctor for all these years.

The concept for the series must have taken hours to think up, laden with concern for the behavior and development of the youngest and most impressionable of children…not to mention their safety.  It must the old-fashioned definition of “acceptability” that is causing me enormous despair with regard to the notion that three-, four-, and five-year-olds are sitting on their couches ogling a big you-know-what hanging from a bunch of balloons and laughing.  What parent wouldn’t want that for his kids?

The same parents who don’t want their offspring desensitized to the possibility that being approached by one in real life isn’t funny at all.  With the unending number of pedophilia and child-trafficking stories plaguing the news of late, the blatant disregard for the potential harm this type of programming could cause children is gobsmacking, not to mention the open-door policy it offers sick individuals who will take advantage of this new wokeness.  Thus says the mom of five who was required to pass a “Safe Environments Training Course” in order to substitute teach in her young son’s Catholic school — the goal of the course being to recognize potential pedophiles prior to them ruining children’s lives.

Programs like this make “acceptable” what should never be made acceptable for kids and families — a means for entertainment to push the envelope as far as parents will allow.  Parents should never allow this and should push back hard.  If they don’t, they will be viewed as in agreement, completely fine with the already $9.8-billion U.S. sex trafficking industry and the 100,000 children across our nation being prostituted annually.   The fact is, if one country greenlights such a show, it is only a matter of time till other similar shows arrive to the scene in our own neighborhood.  Where is Mr. Rogers when you need him?

What is even more disheartening about this series is that taxpayers paid for it to be broadcast to kids.  This is what this particular public broadcaster deemed “a good investment” — worth taxpayer money. 

Having been involved children’s programming, I’ve known broadcasters to make some questionable choices especially in the face of some really great programming that never makes it to air.  However, choosing a man wielding his penis over basically anything else is difficult to comprehend.  And don’t tell me preschoolers will know that “this is all in fun” or “not to be believed.”  We both know that at that age, especially, kids cannot differentiate between “real” and “imaginary.”  That’s why they cling to characters like Barney, Dora, and their own personal imaginary friends.  It’s the same reason why any children’s entertainment property that includes God is immediately tossed into the round file by many mainstream broadcasters.  The desire to give God a stage and support the formation of a strong attachment between God and young viewers simply isn’t there.  Why would they want to empower children to the core when they have so many other important elements to cover, like how perfectly natural it is to want to change your gender as a tyke or agree to a vaccine without Mommy’s and Daddy’s consent?  Why nourish our most vulnerable with “food for the soul” to make them feel whole and strong when you can simply ply them easily with candy, condemn them to a confused and weakened state, and direct them to where you want them to go?  

Suffice it to say, the only way children’s entertainment is ever going to get better is if parents demand it.  We need to start throwing our weight around in the face of these harmful agendas and faulty programming decisions and speak up on behalf of our kids in the form of ratings and dollars.  That is the only way broadcasters will listen and our kids will benefit.  Our children aren’t old enough to know what’s good for them…what they should want.  We are.  The onus is on us.